Thursday, April 14, 2005

Rough period as a mother

Siddhant is 6.5 months old now. Getting naughtier, rather more active by the day and requires constant activity. He is such a curious child. Constantly on the move and always looking to see what new stuff his parents are upto or are new in his surroundings.

My father passed away on April 2nd 2005 in India. Sad i could not go, with my little hero, i felt it would be very difficult handling him. Instead i went to Houston, TX where i have family and spent a week there.

I had just started solid feeding about 3-4 weeks back and soon went to Houston for a week. Also had just managed to make siddhant sleep through the entire night from 8pm-5:30am. Going to Houston added more stress on me trying to feed him solids (as i make them at home and dont give him the outside gerber stuff). His sleep at night got little disrupted and kept waking up at new place. Something i expected, as he slept with me and not in his crib.

When new developmental phases are going on, avoid travelling. This is not only going help you (the mother) be sane, but also for the child to get used to the routine. He was eating solids as if he had been eating them all his life and after going to Houston, he behaved as if he detested them. I guess it was just a phase, or a new place. Handling him in a new place caused little stress to me. Constantly wondering how people are going to judge my mothering skills. Since my cousin had a 2.5 year old daughter and she was really spoken well about her mothering skills by everyone, got me more anxious.

The trip basically taught me a lesson. That when travelling, or any other time, one should try to stay calm and not be too anxious. And one has to stop comparing oneself with other mothers. Every mother has a different way of bringing up her child and also every child is different (being born with different genes).

Americans have a way with travelling with children and that too with multiples. I really wonder how!! May be because they dont care too much about a routine, what their child eats, bottle feeding, a binky on most of the time to stop them from crying. If you are not one among that clan, like me, then face facts, travelling for leisure with a child, will not be leisure.

Ofcourse, Siddhant had a good time otherwise, very social, enjoyed with his aunts and cousins and smiling and playing away to glory. Did not bother him, that he was travelling in the flight and in a new place altogether. He was simply having fun noticing all the fun stuff going on around him. I sure can see he loves to be around people. Surely a social and fun being.

The toll only takes on the new parents and more on me since i am nursing and trying to get so many phases of developments happen smoothly. Well ofcourse, it has also taught me that i should not be too rigid on myself, and let developments happen at their own pace and not push myself too hard or Siddhant too hard.


Archana Ramesh said...

Hi Archana,
I'm Archana too and I write up a blog called Archana's Journal. Its at
Congratulations on Siddhant...a very pretty name. Motherhood has its own joys....your child teaches you how to be a mom. Both of you grow up together... :)

Archana Doshi said...

Hi, thats nice to know you have a blog as well as a name as mine