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Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Questions? Why's?

R and I ask questions all the time and question things all the time as well. Well now ours are sensible ones (mostly!!).

What about a 4.5 yr old whose questions are endless, i mean literally. One after another, at one point I am forced to tell him don't be senseless. And there is this brother of his who has followed him early enough since he was 2.5 yrs, now 3 yrs to ask questions as well. They go louder over each other to ask questions and eventually start screaming so their voices are heard.

Right now, the state I am, I seem to not be able to even think and have a mind of my own. I cant think, I cant talk nor am I able to question. Why? I'll tell you, where is the MY SPACE and TIME. There you go, I have this blog where I am able to vent out and you kind folks listen, Thank You

This is blogging time, I get to write - think, but really I don't even get to talk with DH!! Phewww.. Kids please I am not asking you to stop asking, but slow it down please.

4 comments:

Vibaas said...

Archana, sorry i couldn't get back to you after i posted my comment a week or so back.

These are few things that helped me. Again, each child is different and what works/worked for me, may not work for you, but you can give it a shot.

One thing that i found with my first son was that he did not react well to changes/surprises. I started preparing him for it in advance and got better results. For eg, when we goto some birthday party, i would tell him several times before leaving the house that we may have to leave before other kids leave, but we can always meet them again at a later time and play. This worked. Sometimes he still threw tantrums, but was less intense than other times and also he was okay about leaving, most of the times. This is just an example. In this busy world, it is always not possible for us to give them plenty of time or to prepare them in advance, but over a period, it got easier. he's 6 now and we still have some rough days, but trust me it gets better. Also, now that he's in school i never have to worry about his studies. I guess since we are drained with all the discipling, they spare us here :)

Another thing that helped was positive reinforcement. Instead of giving timeouts, i created a timetable. My first son used to take too much time for dinner. In the time table, i said 7-8.30 is dinner + computer time. If you eat till 8.15, you get only 15 minutes computer time, whereas if u eat fast, u get more and that worked like a charm. When i drafted the timetable, i made him sit next to me and kinda made it look like he drafted it for himself. So, he felt proud and felt he had the control on it. I think this is getting way too long. Pls. feel free to mail me at vidyabalaje@gmail.com, anytime and i'll be glad to help. I know it is always nice to have someone in the same boat to chat with.

Anonymous said...

archana,
good way i've created to answer questions - is to toss the ball back into their court.
so if kid goes "why are polar bears white?" I reply "why do you think?" Makes them think - and should work a lil while till they wise up to you !! ;-)
jandy

Pavithra Doraiswamy said...

Archana, I can connect to this article very well. I face the same thing. Like one of the other viewer mentioned tossing the ball back to their court really helps. Its a nice trick.

sarah said...

My son has asperges so questions are a constant and there is no "getting around" an issue until all its ins and outs have been throughly discussed, but as tough as it can be, and believe me I know, it is good to see them communicating and not spending all their waking hours glued to the play-station!!!